Prince of thr Astral Kingdom Chapter 1 pg 17

9th Mar 2018, 2:25 AM in The Beast of the Medina Azzahra
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Prince of thr Astral Kingdom Chapter 1 pg 17
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Comments:

chris-tar 9th Mar 2018, 5:25 AM edit delete reply
chris-tar
If I were writing the story, I would have the protagonist throw a hidden dagger into the oncoming pack leader... but perhaps that is hackneyed...
Zachary Cullen Alford 9th Mar 2018, 3:18 PM edit delete reply
Zachary Cullen Alford
Well, he's a little preoccupied at the moment. And he's supposed to be running out of steam. I guess I didn't make the visual fit the narrative very well. My bad.
chris-tar 9th Mar 2018, 3:35 PM edit delete reply
chris-tar
You haven't failed at anything. Maybe I am too dull to interpret it properly? But I understand that in order to become better at one's craft, you must often be your own worst critic.
snuffysam 9th Mar 2018, 2:08 PM edit delete reply
snuffysam
Weakness? What weakness, that he just killed one of your men?
Zachary Cullen Alford 9th Mar 2018, 3:13 PM edit delete reply
Zachary Cullen Alford
I know! I was going to say that too. With a flying leap and a perfect front somersault. But I guess he's breathing heavily now. Maybe I should add some of your style sound effects, like "STAGGER".
snuffysam 9th Mar 2018, 3:15 PM edit delete reply
snuffysam
Ha ha, that would be hilarious!
AmeliaP 11th Mar 2018, 10:30 PM edit delete reply
AmeliaP
I think the strategy of the leader of keeping a safe distance is right. Usually who's leading the troop is back because he has to see and define the situation to command his men to the next move. I didn't think it was a wrong strategy of the leader being out of the reach until now.
Zachary Cullen Alford 12th Mar 2018, 2:49 AM edit delete reply
Zachary Cullen Alford
Right! But he has to act now if he doesn't want to maybe have to face our hero alone! Ha ha!
AmeliaP 26th Mar 2018, 9:53 PM edit delete reply
AmeliaP
Oh yeah :)
AmeliaP 26th Mar 2018, 10:15 PM edit delete reply
AmeliaP
Can't wait to see the prince taking down the leader.